::thankful – for returning strength and regenerating tastebuds.

::Kill All the Cells! –  Everyone is inquiring about what’s next…here’s what I know.  First order of business is to recover from the chemo.  It takes a toll on the body, my friends. I look like I’ve been stranded for six months in a jungle and then had a car wreck immediately after being rescued.  My brain power is coming back fast, as well as my energy.

Second order of business is to reintroduce my muscles to moving and stretching and build up some strength. I’m keeping my terrain in order – clean eating, eliminating what environmental triggers I can from our home environment, stress reduction for the entire family, and plenty of physical activity.  Third order of business is growing hair.  Lots and lots of hair.  It’s about 1/4 inch long right now, and I am anxious for the day I can ditch the scarves, hats and wigs. Just as soon as there isn’t any scalp showing, I’m getting my hair shaped into an adorable Audrey Hepburn pixi cut!

I’m still Dancing with Ned; my next CT Scan is this week. I’ll continue to have a CT scan every 8-12 weeks until I reach the fifteen month milestone.  That’s a big one for ULMS survivors – if it’s going to rear it’s ugly head again in spite of having its DNA shredded and reproductive faculties obliterated by the chemo, it usually happens that fast.  Next milestone after that is the two year mark.  That’s the point where statistics start shifting towards real long-term survival.

I did have my tumor tested for hormone receptivity and it was positive, which is a good thing in cancer world.  This means that there are oral medications with minimal side effects available to help block future tumor growth and more effective options for treatment protocols such as surgery and radiation should I need them again.  I’ll meet regularly with my oncologist  and keep up with CT scans every four to six months for another five years, then annually for the rest of my life. I think Dr. Cloven and I will be good friends for many years.  We should probably name our grandkids after each other.

::delicious

• Turkey Paninis on Sourdough, All Hail Kale Salad
• Hamburgers at Grandma Jane’s House!
• Garlic Lime Chicken, Green Beans
• Corn Chowder, Cheddar Chive Scones
• Cobb Salads
• Baked Ziti, Spinach Salad
• Blackened Tilapia, Israeli Couscous and Veggie Salad

Lots of salad.  Yep.  It’s starting to get warm again.

::fashionable –    Soft grey tank dress, multi colored head wrap and BIG dangly earrings.  I made these years ago – the stones are lemon chryosite.

::creative – I really am feeling better – I’m starting to plan projects!  I need a new light weight summer robe, and have a stash of pretty paisley cotton in the craft cabinet.  I think some sewing is in order.  Knitting happens at all times in all seasons, so that’s a given.  My beading supplies have been whispering to me lately, reminding me that I have many pieces that could use a fresh remake and planting ideas for new treasures to be made, rosaries to be strung.

::praying for – Donna and Dan, for strength and grace in the coming days; Tom and Judy, as they care for aging parents;  friends with special intentions.

Keep the Faith.

::thankful – Prayers of rejoicing!  He is Risen Indeed!  Cherry Ames has a job! She’ll be working at a local hospital as a critical care nurse.  DirtBike had an amazing progress report with fabulous grades all around!  The Architect won the student council election and will be the student body president next year!  Princess Pea won a Windows tablet!  How COOL is that??

:captured –  Easter Selfie…because I couldn’t remember how to work the timer on the big camera, and Mass started in 20 minutes.

::creative – I finally, finally finished that knitted lace hat. It’s gorgeous, if I do say so.

::Kill All the Cells! –  I’ve been laying low lately, not posting or writing much, mostly because I feel pretty rotten.  I have finished TEN rounds of chemo.  We’ve run upon some complications, namely a lot of fluid buildup around my lungs and heart.  More meds have been prescribed and I’m feeling better, just really, really tired.  I nodded off at mass Sunday morning like a two-year old!  Three more weeks, two more infusions and I’ll be DONE, ready to live a very long rest of my life!

::delicious

• I cooked dinner last night!  Actually stood in my kitchen, chopped, seasoned and cooked real food:  grilled chicken, tossed veggie salad and saffron rice.
• We’re winging it the rest of the week.

::fun – Cardboard Boat Regatta, Prom (The Architect!!), maybe some gardening.  Easter Dinner with Friends!  The Architect is to the left with Mr. Pea; Princess Pea just right of me. DirtBike was out in the front driving his RC Car when we snapped the picture.  What wonderful friends we have!

::fashionable –   Whatever is comfortable.  Since everything hurts, I’m doing my best to keep soft, drapey and pretty next to my skin.

Keep the Faith.

::faithful – prayers of thanksgiving and joy – it was another a beautiful weekend! I sat outside in a lawn chair and watched Mr. Pea and DirtBike wax the cars.

::Kill All the Cells!! – Second chemo infusion was not as easy as the first.  It was the double dose day. I get one full dose of Gemzar in the first week of a cycle, then a second full dose of Gemzar AND a full dose of Taxotere AND a Neulasta shot in the second week of the cycle. The Gemzar scrambles the DNA inside the cells; the Neulasta forces my bone marrow to make white blood cells; and the Taxotere?  She’s a Mean Girl!  The first clue was the immediate allergic reaction to the drip.  I’m sitting there clicking away on my laptop sending messages for work and all of a sudden the world sped up.  I was HOT, my heart was pounding and I couldn’t talk.  Cherry Ames was with me and called the nurse.  They laid me out flat and immediately injected Benadryl and steroids straight into my port line.  WHOOSH!  It was like being the Star Trek Enterprise flying along at warp speed and then suddenly coming to a stop.  I became quite Zen, all relaxed and chatty.  I was feeling okay on the steroids for the next 30-ish hours and then came the crash.  Ugh. Saturday evening and Sunday were rough.  Taxotere does a good job at killing cells, but she’s not very discriminate.  She takes out a lot of healthy cells as well, like the inside of your mouth, taste buds, and all the good bugs in your gut that keep the plumbing working correctly.  All in all, it feels like extreme morning sickness, complete with nausea, aches and general lethargy, but without the anticipation of a sweet baby on the other end!  By Tuesday morning I felt human again.

The good news is that this is an OFF WEEK!!  No chemo, just lab draws and rest.

::creative – Making progress on the beanie.

::pondering –  Life in general. The fun stuff that we’re going to do this spring and summer.

::delicious – Wonderful neighbors stocked our freezer for this week – Yeah!!!

• Brisket, Macaroni and Cheese, Green Beans
• Chicken Soup
• Vegetable Soup
• Manicotti, Salad
• Chicken and Tater Tot Casserole
• Eat All The Leftovers!
• Black Bean Tamales, Salad

Oh, and I didn’t get to all the planned baking last week. I did make an applesauce cake in the midst of my medically induced frenzy on Saturday morning, and we’ve been snacking on it.  Yum!

::fun – Ordination of our New Bishop!!  I will not be attending, as that day coincides with my lowest white blood cell counts and I can’t risk being in a crowded public arena.  Mr. Pea can’t get off work this afternoon, either.  However, the Architect and Cherry Ames will be there!  Cherry Ames just started a clinical rotation as the school nurse at The Architect’s high school; she’ll be manning one of the first aid stations during the ordination.

The head of our survey department at work is also undergoing cancer treatment.  I told him that between him being radioactive and me being poisonous, we should be superheroes and wear capes to work.  I am seriously, SERIOUSLY considering whipping up some satin capes with bling for us to wear to staff meetings – Radioactive Man and Poison Girl!!

::fashionable –  Dark Purple cashmere sweater, tweed dress pants, sassy boots. And a new haircut!  Check it out!

I decided to be brave and buzz my head before it starts falling out – a decision made after talking to friends who have already walked this path and assured me that shedding hair all over the house is not only traumatic, it’s messy as all get-out and clogs up both the shower drain and the vacuum hose. Honestly?  I LIKE my hair short!  I’ve wanted a short sassy pixie style for decades, but have deferred to Mr. Pea’s preference for longer locks.  I am immensely relieved to discover that I have a very prettily shaped head – no lumps or bumps.  Most of this mini short hair will fall out before the end of this week, if all goes according to schedule – but it will be easier to clean up with just a sticky lint roller.

::looking ahead –  MathCounts on Saturday, storm drain system analysis, and finishing a report that has been nagging me since December.

Take a Nap. Keep the Faith.